Icecream anyone?
by Jacceh
Summary: Finally finished, ending rather stupid. Saïx decides to play a game, but will Xemnas agree to it? XemnasSaïx,Twoshot. YAOI. Warning inside.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Oh alright, I admit it. I had this twisted story sitting in my mind for a while. And lucky you, I decided to post it. I'm sure you readers have either heard or seen people use food in sexual intercourses at times and it is a two-shot. Anyway Xemnas is rather clueless here…Not to mention that Saïx here is like an ultimate uke…o.o**

**Warning: Yes this story may contain content that may disturb sensitive readers. If you do not like to read dirty sex, then please turn back now. (Well, actually this chapter hasn't got really limey content yet, but the next chapter will.)**

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Sprawled out comfortably on the large, leather couch was who? None other than the Superior of the infamous Organization XIII, rather odd actually. It seemed like the Superior would normally be on the Altar of Naught complimenting how wonderful Kingdom Hearts was looking these days. Xemnas decided to take it easy today, as he found a rather, interesting book in his bookshelf he had overlooked a few times before. The book contained none other than information describing different feelings, and Xemnas found this very appealing. However he was interrupted when someone carelessly opened his door and walked in. Xemnas snapped out of his thoughts, and looked up to his intruder with an extremely irritated look written all over his features, who had dared to barge in at a time like this?

"Xemnas, I decided to drop by and see what you were up to." He knew that voice too well. He turned back to reading his book.

"Number VII, what can I do for you?" Saïx's piercing golden eyes lingered on Xemnas's laid-back posture.

"I see you decided to take it easy today…I thought you would be pouring out your feelings to that precious Kingdom Hearts of yours." Xemnas looked up at the Diviner, rather offended and flipped a page.

"Don't be absurd, Saïx. You know very well we don't have any feelings…And I'm sure Superiors' are allowed to take some time off, am I correct?" Saïx sniggered.

"I guess, and what is that book you are reading? I suppose it's about hearts?" Saïx said, folding his arms. Xemnas eyes flicked over to his Sub Co-ordinate's smug attitude.

"That is none of your concern Saïx. And may I ask what is the real reason that you came here to see me for?"

"I was bored and I'm wondering if you could entertain me." He said promptly, Xemnas sighed.

"I'm sure either Luxord's game of poker or Demyx's singing would be able to keep you amused for while."

"Been there, tried that, didn't work." Xemnas ignored his berserker's piercing gaze and continued to flip through his book.

"Saïx, you're very irritating…Can't you do something else instead of bothering me?" He was so obsessed with his book that he didn't even notice that Saïx was towering over him.

"Xemnas, I don't understand how that book is so appealing to you…." Xemnas jumped when he found the Diviner's weight on his thighs, he sighed, looking defeated and finally closing his book.

"Saïx, what do you want?" Saïx's smirked, and leaned in to toy with his Superior's pull-string, tugging at it. He had finally gotten his attention, now all he had to do was Xemnas interested in what he had in mind.

"Why, don't we…play a game?" Xemnas shot him a weary look, still holding his book in one hand.

"And what exactly do you have in mind…?" With a sly smile, Saïx got off his Superior and walked into the kitchen next door. Xemnas heard him rummage through cupboards and the refrigerator, he frowned slightly, what was he doing? His questions was answered when the Diviner came in, holding a small tub of chocolate ice-cream and a spoon?

"What…what are those for?" Xemnas stammered, an almost demure expression written on his features. Saïx arched an eyebrow.

"No need to look shy Xemnas, these are the equipment used for our game…" Xemnas hesitated, the book slipping a bit from his fingers.

"I'm still not convinced that including ice-cream is a good idea for this game…"

"But Xemnas, the ice-cream is one of the main used item in this game."

"Saïx, really. This is getting ridiculous…" Saïx gave him a disappointed look, turned around to flop himself over Xemnas's bed.

"Oh…Too bad, I'm sure it would have been wild." Xemnas's eyes widened slightly at that sentence. Saïx pulled the lid off the container and began to pamper himself.

Xemnas found himself getting annoyed watching Saïx lick the ice-cream off the spoon so tenderly. He continued to watch the Diviner's tongue twirl around the spoon until he…snapped. He did not understand why, but watching Saïx "mucking" around with the spoon coursed some discomfort inside Xemnas's chest. He slammed the book on the table next to him.

"Fine, have it your way. I'll…play that bizarre game of yours." Saïx stopped licking the spoon and smiled, his golden eyes shining deviously.

"Sudden change of mind?" Xemnas huffed but didn't say anything. Saïx gracefully slipped off the bed and swept over to him.

"I'm pretty sure you know what the rules are…We will take turns…No matter where the ice-cream is smeared the other has to lick it off…Now, doesn't sound enjoyable?" Saïx added with slight purr, Xemnas looked like he clearly regretted getting himself into this mess; Saïx chuckled a little, settling himself on his Superior's lap again.

"Don't worry Xemnas, I promise to go easy on you on the first round."

Xemnas swallowed, looking at the Diviner with intense eyes, he had entirely forgotten about his book and was somehow giving the Diviner his fullest attention. Saïx smirked, dipping the spoon into the ice-cream and stopped to give Xemnas a questionable look. Xemnas paused before giving him a slight nod.

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******Ok, well. Do you want me to continue? I know very well what will happen next. So if you really want me post the next chapter, just drop me a review. If not, turn back now and regret that you had ever read this. Hahaha...smex 8D  
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	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: -Breaks keyboard- I'm sorry…Let's face it, I'm a shitty lemon writer, even with my ultra perverted mind, I guess this still doesn't come out too well…I've let you all down ;.; **  
**I've pondered over this piece of writing for ages, hoping that it didn't sound like I chopped a slap of someone else's writing and stuck it on mine…but I guess the results are still the same…-sigh- And I can't really concentrate when you have one of your parents pacing in and out of the room… . So it might sound rushed in some bits. Warning now. 8D**

**Warning: As I stated in the previous chapter, please turn back now if you have a sensitive mind OR stomach. Thankies.  
**

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Saïx grinned, making sure his Superior was watching him closely he smeared the chocolate liquid down his neck. Xemnas watched as the liquid dripped slowly down the Diviner's neck. Without realising it, he pushed the berserker down roughly against the couch, closed the space in between them and pressed his lips against the other's neck. 

Saïx melted against the lips there were gently pressed against his neck. In response, he brushed his hand lightly against other's pale locks, mewling softly to urge him on. Xemnas continued to run his tongue over the graceful curve of his neck, repeating the action over the pale skin until all the ice-cream was gone. However even when he did finish he felt Saïx hot and clinging on him underneath him, not wanting him to stop. He did not notice himself grinding against the other in need. Saïx pulled back a little, eyes glazed.

"I see you're quite responsive already…" Xemnas arched an eyebrow, unconvinced.

"I don't see how I am responding that much..." It was Saïx's turn to look displeased.

"You think? Then I suppose that that awfully tight looking pants doesn't explain anything…" Xemnas blinked before looking down, his face flushed when he indeed, went commando. Saïx smirked, pleased that he had managed to successfully distract Xemnas again.

"Xemnas, You were grinding yourself against my thigh…I know that you are an ultimate bluffer, but I believe that your own pants sold you out this time." Xemnas's eyes narrowed.

"I see your point and I am impressed at the amount of times that you manage to catch me off-guard. Now why don't we stop all that worthless talk and get on with the process?" Saïx let out a little chortle; grasping that fact that other nobody was unconsciously enjoying the game.

"I see that you're starting to like the game already."

"Don't sound so satisfied VII, it's only the beginning."

Saïx watched anxiously as Xemnas took his turn, which resulted that sweet liquid was splattered over his mouth. Saïx pounced on him as soon as Xemnas was finished, smashing his lips against the other in a rather ungrateful manner. He nibbled on his Superior's chocolate coated lips before forcing a tongue inside, which Xemnas accepted gratefully, moaning softly as the berserker roamed his mouth. Tongues slid against each other hungrily. Xemnas found his own hands fumbling with the smaller nobody's clothing, his fingers reaching the silver zipper and pulling it down to reveal the well toned, pale chest underneath.  
Xemnas pulled back panting a little, but still eager to continue the tongue tussle with Number VII, however it seemed like the Diviner had read his mind and put a hand on his lips, stopping him for pulling in for another kiss.

"You've had your turn now Xemnas, don't get too greedy." He watched his Superior give him such innocent pleading eyes and smiled weakly.

"Well…since that your wandering fingers have pulled off my cloak…" His sentence trailed off as he slapped a damn whole spoon of ice cream all over his chest. Xemnas stared.

"Isn't that…a bit too much?" Saïx glared at him.

"Well are you going to keep continue or pull out? AHH-"

A hot, wet tongue assaulted him, catching him completely off-guard. Saïx cried out softly and brought his arms up to embrace Xemnas's head against his chest. The pleasure was quite unbearable already, Xemnas simply had an affect on him, and those gentle, soft touches sent shivers running through his body. Xemnas continued to please and tease the berserker, twirling his tongue around the hardened nub, feeling the sturdy grip around his head tighten every second; although it was very disrespectful of VII it was also quite arousing at the same time. Those maddening moans were starting to sink in and Xemnas found his pants unbearably tight and where starting to demand attention. As he continued his course of with other nipple he found the one of Diviner's hands yanking at his own cloak. Just as he finished his job the bothering clothing was thrown carelessly on the floor. He looked up at Saïx's lustful eyes and flushed face and grinned.

"Things are starting you get heated…don't you agree?" Muttering he began to toy with the other's equally tight pants. Saïx purred and amused himself with Superior's neck, nibbling slightly as his hands ran down to the waist of his pants. With a swift motion they were ripped off; clean, not to mention his boxers. Xemnas blinked, still in the middle of unzipping the berserker's pants. Saïx pulled at those silver locks, starting to look rather impatient.

"You sure love to take things nice and slow don't you Xemnas…?" With that his yellow eyes narrowed dangerously, the grip on those soft glimmering locks tightening. Xemnas again blinked rather dumbly, sighed and managed to pull off the infuriated one's tight clothing without keeping him waiting too long.

"Well, I must say myself that I find your agility simply amazing when it comes to sex, even I can't keep up..." Saïx chose to ignore that statement and continued to pull at one's hair.

"Brace yourself now Saïx." Amber eyes glinting deviously as his hand headed towards the tub, Saïx tilted his head to the side and arched an eyebrow.

"For what?" His question was answered when he released where his next target was.

_Oh, what the f- ? Why there of all places?  
_  
Xemnas noticed the Diviner's uncertainty and grinned, running a hand under the chin of VII and tilted his head upwards to meet his burning amber eyes.

"Please don't tell me you're backing out now…things are just starting to get entertaining." Finishing he stroked the pale chin lightly that was resting in between his fingers. Saïx couldn't hide back a small frown.

"You're just saying that because now I have to-" Stopping to look at where the ice-cream rested, the grin on his leader's face widened.

"Indeed, not stop cowering and finish your job." Saïx couldn't help but pouted a little and bowed his head to draw in that stiff length. Xemnas stifled back a moan as the diviner's hot mouth closed around his erection, sucking softly around the engorged flesh, as his tongue worked its way underneath. Xemnas found himself pushing back against that warm throat, coursing the other to swallow gingerly, not to mention that by now the mixture of ice-cream and pre-cum running down his throat. Saïx started to feel that the other's movement were starting to come jerky and frenzied. Just when Xemnas felt that he was going to lose himself violently in that mouth, Saïx pulled back entirely and nipped at the extremely sensitive tip, that action caused Xemnas to groan loudly in desperation, due to the fact that the Diviner had left him teetering the edge of orgasm.

Saïx seemed to have sensed his urgency gave him a malicious leer as he crawled in between his Superior's legs.

"I'm terribly sorry Xemnas but I would have liked it better if you came inside me."

Xemnas felt his body jerk against the berserker's in response. Positioning himself he grabbed the smaller nobody's hips firmly and slid his tongue along the pointed tip of his ear.

"If that's what you want then so be it…" With that he pushed himself inside that yearning body and growled softly as he felt Saïx clench hard around him. Saïx shivered as he felt his leader sink deep in before rocking into him slowly, then setting off a steady pace. Wanting to feel closer he hooked a leg around the waist permitting the other nobody to slid in even deeper. Xemnas felt himself trust harder as the Diviner's grip on his painful arousal grew tighter. Unconsciously he released one hand's firm grip that was on Saïx's hip and reached in between their sweat, slick bodies to palm the other's stiff length.

Saïx cried out as he felt his Superior wrap his hand around his aching erection, the pleasure was too intense and went overboard as Xemnas started to stroke him in rhythm to his thrusts. The berserker gasped for breath as he was pushed closer to his climax, hips jerking against the other. Unable to take anymore he threw back his head and screamed in pleasure as he spilled himself hot and sticky in his leader's hand before falling back into a pleasured loose-limbed sprawl.

Xemnas froze as he felt the Diviner's body spasm hard around him, he froze, and heard Saïx coo as he came hard and deep into his body. He collapsed onto of him, panting hard. It took quite a while for both of them to regain their breath, Saïx smirked nuzzling his Superior's neck, enjoying the warmth that the other was providing.

"I rather enjoyed that game of yours…even though I knew it was just one of your pitiable excuses just to get into my pants." Xemnas said, finally breaking the silence. Finally, he was able to pull himself out of Saïx with a soft wet soft and sat up, looking around the messed up room.

"And it seems like this place needs a little cleaning up, but before that let treat ourselves to an enjoyable hot bath." Not caring about what the other had to say Xemnas grabbed Saïx's wrist and dragged him towards the bathroom.

----_-----_**Excusemeforamomentmyeyesarebleeding--------**

_Later…_

**Knock, knock.**

There was an uncomfortable silence, followed by sounds of someone rushing to put on their leather coats. Vexen simply stood there, transfixed at the door until his Superior cautiously opened his door, looking rather uneasy.

"Yes…?" Number IV happened to notice that his leader was pulling awkwardly at the collar of his coat, not to mention he looked slightly ruffled. Vexen blinked for a few moments, merely staring until the staring amber eyes of his Superior brought him back to reality.

"Oh right, Superior…I was wondering if you could sort out a problem for me?" Xemnas suddenly looked weary as he continued to straighten out his coat.

"And what is it that is causing you so much trouble that you had to come running to me?" Vexen cleared his throat, readying for a speech.

"Well you see, Number VI happens to be missing his special mix of…uhem, chocolate ice-cream. For some reason he claims that I would bother to take his blend to experiment, and somehow he even managed to cut me off access to my own lab…and I'm sure you know that I cannot progress any further without it…" Xemnas just stood there, giving him a stare that almost made him feel foolish for turning up at his door.

"Are you sure he didn't put an illusional wall in front of your lab door?"

"Of course not! I would know very well if there was one."

"So he is saying that you took his ice-cream for experimenting?"

"Well…yes, actually Roxas gave that tub to him for a taste and he seems like Number VI has gotten addicted to it ever since."

"Number XIII _gave_ that to him?"

"Yes Roxas did and…what in the name of science happened here?" Xemnas immediately stiffened as Vexen had seized the chance to peek past his shoulder.

"Xemnas…your office…looks chaotic, and what happened to that couch? Why…it's practically covered in that chocolate ice-cream. So you were the one who took it…And who's that curled up in your bed? " Vexen's eyes enlarged as he almost glared at his clearly cringing Superior.

"Ah, Superior. So you were the one who ended up with my ice-cream?"

Both Vexen and Xemnas jumped when Zexion mysteriously appeared next to them, clutching a black leather covered book.

"I hope you will replace it for me, Superior or I will be force to show everyone these extremely peculiar yet disturbing photos…" Vexen simply arched an eyebrow while Xemnas looked rather troubled.

"What exactly are you talking about…?" Zexion smiled, handing the book to his baffled Superior.

"I'm sure you understand what I mean once you see them."

Curious, Xemnas slowly opened the book with Vexen peering at his shoulder. Immediately Vexen crouched over, supporting a heavy nosebleed as he discovered that the book was filled with private, though alarmingly disturbing photos of both Xemnas and Saïx. Xemnas couldn't hide his flinch this time and closed the book instantly.

"Where…did you get these photos from?" Xemnas asked, voice quivering with dread, Zexion flicked a piece of metallic silver-blue hair out of his eyes before facing Number I with such a gloating face.

"Let's just say I had them specifically taken, now could you please go and retrieve some of that more luscious ice-cream from Roxas?" Xemnas would have sent the Cloaked Schemer flying down the stairs if it weren't for that photo album. Before Xemnas could do anything to the book that contained such personal content Zexion had snatched it out his hands.  
"But I refuse to give this to you until you have replaced my ice-cream…"

Xemnas gritted his teeth before eying him with a forced, calm expression.

"And where will I find Number XIII?"

"I suppose you will find him raiding the fridge at this time." Grumbling and cursing under his breath his summoned a portal and disappeared through it.

There was the most uncomfortable silence ever.

Vexen pointed an accusing finger at the gloating nobody and was still trying to stop the flow of his blood that was emitting from his nose.

"I must say you are extremely talented at manipulating people."

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"Number XIII, I was hoping to find you here."

Roxas immediately stuck his head out of the freezer, holding a sky-blue ice-cream out of his mouth. His expression changed instantaneously when he saw his Superior standing right next to him, stumbling clumsily to his feet he faced him courteously.

"I was wondering if you still had of that irresistible ice-cream that you generously gave to Zexion."

Roxas blinked innocently before giving Xemnas a quick, panicky nod. Again he raided through the fridge, finally pulling out another small tub of chocolate ice-cream. Number XIII then scrambled to Xemnas handing out the tub with an arm's length, gaze dropping to the floor.

"I can't thank you enough, XIII. You have no idea how much this means to me." Without warning he pulled the tiny, shocked nobody into a quick hug before releasing him and teleporting away.

Roxas just stood there, dumbfounded, blue liquid dripping out of his mouth.

**--------------------------------------**

"Here Zexion." Snarling, Xemnas trust the tub into VI's arms like it contained some kind of infectious disease. Almost that instant Zexion's face lightened up.

"Many thanks Superior…" He threw him the album, which Xemnas caught tentatively before stalking off; the ice-cream clutched tightly into his arms like it was some kind of precious artefact. Xemnas fled into his office, slamming the door behind him. Vexen was still standing there, not believing what had just happened.

"That was…entertaining to say at least…"

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**Honestly, I had no idea where those last three paragraphs came from…Ah yeah. You can all now imagine what Xemnas is going to do with that album.**

**Well, this story had taken a while and wouldn't stop haunting me until I had finished writing it…-sigh- Anyway leave a review or flame…And sorry if I made any mistakes, I'll fix them up if there is any.**


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